Below is a brief summary of what talked about tonight. Most of the time we teach through a series for several weeks at a time that way students that miss can get caught back up quickly, and so we can dissect a topic more fully than just a one night deal. Use the overview and questions for both you and your teen to answer and have a dialog that continues outside the church walls and into your homes. Use this opportunity to see what God is teaching your student and also allow your student to see what God is teaching/taught you.
Current Series:
This Week's Recap:
Week #3 (12.14.2016): Power Source
Bottom Line: The Holy Spirit helps you follow through.
What we talked about:
Have you ever made a New Year’s resolution? There’s just something about a new year that makes us want to do something to make this year different or better than the one before it. The problem with resolutions is that we hardly ever keep them! And if we’re honest, we probably don’t think it’s that big of a deal when we don’t. Maybe that’s why we’re so hesitant to create goals that involve our faith. If we fail to meet that goal, we’ve not just let ourselves down—we feel like we’ve let God down too! Jesus’s disciples often felt a similar kind of pressure when it came to following through with what He called them to do. The things He asked of them sometimes seemed impossible for them to actually do on their own—and they were! But as we look back to the book of Matthew, we’ll see that Jesus left His disciples with an unexpected source of help to follow through with anything He called them to do. And what’s even better, He gives us access to the same so that nothing is impossible for us when we’re with Him.
Just for Parents:
By Autumn WardOne night last December, I found myself sitting at the kitchen table making Christmas cookies – by myself. Not that there’s anything wrong with that, it’s just that was not the plan. That was not our tradition.
Now that my kids are teenagers with busy schedules of their own, no one else was home but me. So there I sat, clinging to my tradition, making cookies alone – and feeling pretty sad about the whole thing. (I’m sure I let everyone know how sad I was when they got home.)
One thing parenting has taught me about traditions is that they are easy to start and hard to let go. So what happens when the kids get older and you find yourself experiencing more transition than tradition?
The first thing I had to do was accept that transition is a part of life. It’s evidence that my kids are growing up and growing up is a good thing. It’s ok that they don’t want to watch Frosty the Snowman or make ornaments out of felt anymore. Now that they’re college and high school age their interests have changed – they are transitioning. Knowing that, if we want to stay connected with our kids, tweaking a tradition or even starting a new one needs to happen.
Second, their dad and I had to decide which traditions were worth clinging to and which ones we needed to let go. We did this by simply asking the kids which traditions meant the most to them. This helped so much! I was surprised by some of the things they said, like getting a peppermint milkshake in our PJs while driving around looking at Christmas lights had to stay. That one still gets two thumbs up! Making the gingerbread house on the other hand…it could go. (And while we’re at it, the Christmas cartoons could go too!) Who knew? They knew! Deciding on traditions with the kids gave us permission to let go of some things – guilt free – and stop trying to force moments to happen that they had outgrown.
Finally, I had to remind myself the purpose of traditions in the first place. Traditions are meant to keep us connected to the ones we love and give us a sense of belonging to something bigger than ourselves – not make us feel exhausted, frustrated and disappointed (maybe even a little depressed). As long as I have a relationship with my kids, things are good. We don’t have to make Christmas cookies to stay connected or to have a relationship or even to have a wonderful Christmas. We just need time with each other.
Now that I have one kid away at college and two teens at home, being together in the same place at the same time is difficult, which makes keeping up with our traditions difficult. I’m learning to make the most of the time I have with my family rather than pout over the time I don’t have.
If we have some minutes in the car, we turn up the Christmas music and sing together. So what if we’re not gathered around the fireplace like we did when they were younger.
Since watching the holiday Hallmark movies is one of my kids’ favorite things to do, I make sure and record them so when we find ourselves together I can pop the popcorn and have a spontaneous movie night.
I allow my kids’ friends to join the fun because my kids really like being with their friends. Rather than look at it like their friends are invading our traditions, I’m thankful my kids and their friends are letting me hangout with them. It’s all in your perspective.
The point is we’re together, staying connected with the ones we love during the holidays. After all, when you really think about it, it’s the relationship with your kids you should be fighting for, not the tradition. So keep a loose grip on those traditions but hold tightly to the hearts of your kids.
Try This:
As parents, it can be tempting to assume which holiday traditions are most important for our family members and which ones aren’t. This Christmas, try asking your son or daughter…• Which Christmas traditions do you hope we keep going for a long time?
• Which ones would you be okay with ending?
• What is one new tradition you’d like to start this year?
By starting the conversation, you may be surprised at what you find. Sometimes traditions that seem silly to us are the most meaningful and memorable to our kids. Remember, fight for the relationship with your kid, not the tradition.
