What's Happenin' @ Fwd Mid-Week

Below is a brief summary of what talked about this week. Most of the time we teach through a series for several weeks at a time that way students that miss can get caught back up quickly, and so we can dissect a topic more fully than just a one night deal. Use the overview and questions for both you and your teen to answer and have a dialog that continues outside the church walls and into your homes. Use this opportunity to see what God is teaching your student and also allow your student to see what God is teaching/taught you.

Current Series:

Think about the last time you heard the word “blessed.” What came to mind? For many of us—and many of our students—the word blessed conjures up images of the coolest clothes, the newest gadgets and a worry-free life. But when we look at what God has to say about being blessed, we realize that we probably have things pretty mixed up. Because if being blessed is more about our relationships—and what we do with them—than the stuff we have, we may have some reevaluating to do in order to redefine what it means to be blessed and realize that we might just be more blessed than we originally thought.

This Week's Recap:

Week # 3 (11.18.2015): What it Means

Bottom Line: Life’s greatest riches are found when we begin to view everything in life as an excuse for relationships.

Now that we’ve established what blessing is not—the stuff we have—and what it truly is—the relationships we possess—we are going to take this idea of blessing one step further and look at the more uncomfortable—but truly remarkable—side of God’s idea of blessing: that God’s blessings are not meant just for us but are meant to be shared. And this isn’t something we are always on board with. But when we live by the truth that we are blessed in order to bless others, we suddenly realize that real blessing comes from giving ourselves completely to the God who made us.

Intentional Interaction 

• How is our entitlement culture impacting your family? And how have you learned to battle it?

For The Parent's Heart

Over the next few weeks we'll leave you with some helpful tips as you move into the Thanksgiving and Christmas seasons to help your family understand the meaning of "Blessed" a little better.

1. Was be a Student of What They are Learning (see last week's email for this)
2. Be a Student of Your Student
3. Action Point
Take some time to read through the following article by Carey Nieuwhof—Lead Pastor at Connexus Community Church north of Toronto Canada—and discuss with your student how you can put at least 1 of the following 5 suggestions into practice.

Five Ways to Fight Entitlement in Your Kids
By Carey Nieuwhof

Like most parents, you feel this terrible tug.

On the one hand, you want to provide your child with every advantage. On the other hand, sometimes it feels like when you do that, you’re feeding an incredibly unhealthy characteristic in our culture.

For whatever reason, we’re living in the midst of an entitlement epidemic. Probably more than any other generation before us, our generation feels as though we have a right to things that used to be defined as wants, or even privileges.
Here’s how the cycle starts:
On the day your child is born, it’s easy to decide as a parent that you need to give your child every advantage.

So you compete. You made sure he had bright colors in his nursery and exactly the right kind of mobile to stimulate his brain, but now it’s an all out frenzy to ensure your preschooler can swim, skate, hit a ball, paint frameable art, read, write and speak classical Greek before his fourth birthday.

And don’t worry, because by the time you’re done with the race to kindergarten, the culture has taken over feeding the frenzy. Your child has now seen enough advertisements and made enough friends to believe that her every desire not only can be met, but should be met. The boots that every other stylish kid is wearing are not a privilege, they are a right. Or so you’ve been told.
And then other inalienable rights emerge: the right to a phone for texting, iPod touches, Facebook and so much more.

Somewhere in the mix, you found yourself realizing that you are tempted to pay your kids for every “act of service” rendered in the house, from emptying the trash to picking up each sock.
And you realize something is desperately wrong. And you would be correct in that.
So, what do you do to fight entitlement in yourself and in your kids? Here are five suggestions:

1.  Be clear on wants and needs. I joke with my kids that we owe them shelter, food and clothes, and I would be happy to slip a pizza under the door to their cardboard house any time they wish (they are 16 and 20, don’t try this with your 5-year-old, but you get the point.) Take time to explain what is actually a need and what a want is. Culture will never explain it to them. You need to.
2.  Reclaim special occasions. There is nothing wrong with not buying wants for your kids in every day life. Save the special things for special occasions like birthdays, Christmas and the like. You don’t need to indulge for no reason. In fact, you probably shouldn’t.
3.   Set a budget and let them choose. With back to school shopping and seasonal purchases, we started setting a budget with our kids early and then let them choose how they would spend it. They become much more frugal shoppers when all of a sudden they realize that money is limited and they can get more if they shop around.
4.  Establish an allowance and expectations. An allowance is a great way for a child to learn responsibility. We’ve encouraged our kids to give 10 percent of every thing they earn, save 10 percent, and live off the rest (the formula gets more restrictive the closer they get to college). Explain what gets covered and not covered out of that allowance.
5.  Be clear about what you will never pay them for. There are some things that you do because you are a part of the family. You can decide where that lands in your home. Make a list of responsibilities that no one gets paid for that you do because you are part of a family. To help with this, why not ask your kids what a reasonable list looks like? Involving them will help them own the decision. Second, make sure you follow up. And hold them responsible for what you all agreed to do. Otherwise you will be tempted to pay for everything or just roll your eyes daily and do it yourself.
Approaches like these can help raise kids who see life as a series of privileges, who live gratefully, and realize their responsibility to others.

What's Happenin @ Fwd Mid-Week

Below is a brief summary of what talked about this week. Most of the time we teach through a series for several weeks at a time that way students that miss can get caught back up quickly, and so we can dissect a topic more fully than just a one night deal. Use the overview and questions for both you and your teen to answer and have a dialog that continues outside the church walls and into your homes. Use this opportunity to see what God is teaching your student and also allow your student to see what God is teaching/taught you.

Current Series:

Think about the last time you heard the word “blessed.” What came to mind? For many of us—and many of our students—the word blessed conjures up images of the coolest clothes, the newest gadgets and a worry-free life. But when we look at what God has to say about being blessed, we realize that we probably have things pretty mixed up. Because if being blessed is more about our relationships—and what we do with them—than the stuff we have, we may have some reevaluating to do in order to redefine what it means to be blessed and realize that we might just be more blessed than we originally thought.

This Week's Recap:

Week # 2 (11.11.2015): What it Is

Bottom Line: Life’s greatest riches are found when we begin to view everything in life as an excuse for relationships.

Maybe we get that our “stuff” isn’t what determines God’s blessing in our life. And maybe we even understand that what God is doing in us and through us is more important than any “thing.” But what about the idea that God’s most extravagant blessings can be found in the ordinary, everyday—and maybe even the annoying—people that we find ourselves surrounded by? What if we counted our blessings not by “what” we have but by “who” we have; by those ordinary and extraordinary relationships that God weaves into our lives? We just might find that we are more blessed than we ever imagined!

Intentional Interaction 

• Why do you think we should aim to find depth in our relationships with others?
• Do you think the way you treat the people around you has an effect on how they feel—not only about you but about themselves? Why or why not?

For The Parent's Heart

Over the next few weeks we'll leave you with some helpful tips as you move into the Thanksgiving and Christmas seasons to help your family understand the meaning of "Blessed" a little better.

1. Was be a Student of What They are Learning (see last week's email for this)
2. Be a Student of Your Student
Entitlement seems to be creeping into our culture through every mode possible—television, magazines, music. The feeling that we have the right to something—or to many “somethings”—seems to be the new cultural norm. And while it’s easy to blame the media, culture and maybe even other families who seem to give their teenagers everything under the sun, it’s important to remember the hard truth that in reality, entitlement begins at home. What we model to our children is the true determining factor in how they view the world; what the world has to offer and what they are entitled to get from it. But the problem is, for many of us, entitlement isn’t something that our kids alone struggle with. Entitlement is our struggle too.

Has this thought ever crossed your mind: “If only there was more money in our family budget, we could do so much more for our children? They could be on the traveling baseball team, and have all the latest gadgets.” Come on. Admit it! There has probably been at least one time in your parenting journey that you have wished for more—more money, more time … more something. And this is totally normal. It’s a struggle that we all face. So, just for fun let’s pretend: You are still you, with your spouse, your children and your extended family, but now you have everything you could ever want—every dollar, every resource, every “thing” and every need met (and most every want met too). How does it feel? Do you feel happier, healthier and more fulfilled? Do you feel more “blessed”?

There is an article that came out in “The Atlantic” in April 2011 entitled “The Secret Fears of the Super Rich.” And while you might expect the focus of this article to be the Dow Jones Index, the real estate market or tax reform, what emerged was something much more relatable to the rest of us. What the article uncovered was the reality that even the super rich fear for the well being of their children. As the article’s summary states: “Does great wealth bring fulfillment? An ambitious study by Boston College suggests not. For the first time, researchers prompted the very rich—people with fortunes in excess of $25 million—to speak candidly about their lives. The result is a surprising litany of anxieties: their sense of isolation, their worries about work and love, and most of all, their fears for their children.” (To read the full article, go to http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2011/04/secret-fears-of-the-super-rich/8419/.)

As one respondent of the survey confided, “Other people glorify wealth and think that it means that the wealthy are smarter, wiser, more ‘blessed’ or some other such crock … it’s hard to get other, non-wealthy people to believe it’s not more significant than that … The novelty of money has worn off.”

Can you imagine being able to say that? To say the novelty of money has worn off? Most of us will never be there, but it sure feels good to know that just because someone has enough money to buy anything their heart desires—for themselves or their children—it doesn’t mean that it alleviates their fears. It doesn’t mean that they are more blessed. As a matter of fact, in most cases, it actually ups the ante on the fear and anxiety level.

Stay Tuned

We are making some changes to this resource that will feature even MORE information you can use.  You've spoken....we are listening.  In the next few weeks you'll see more articles and more news about opportunities for your teen to get plugged in.

What's Happenin @ Fwd Mid-Week

Below is a brief summary of what talked about this week. Most of the time we teach through a series for several weeks at a time that way students that miss can get caught back up quickly, and so we can dissect a topic more fully than just a one night deal. Use the overview and questions for both you and your teen to answer and have a dialog that continues outside the church walls and into your homes. Use this opportunity to see what God is teaching your student and also allow your student to see what God is teaching/taught you.

Current Series:

Think about the last time you heard the word “blessed.” What came to mind? For many of us—and many of our students—the word blessed conjures up images of the coolest clothes, the newest gadgets and a worry-free life. But when we look at what God has to say about being blessed, we realize that we probably have things pretty mixed up. Because if being blessed is more about our relationships—and what we do with them—than the stuff we have, we may have some reevaluating to do in order to redefine what it means to be blessed and realize that we might just be more blessed than we originally thought.

This Week's Recap:

Week # 1 (11.04.2015): What it Isn't

Bottom Line: Being blessed is not about the price of our belongings, but the person we are becoming.

“God Bless you.” We say it all the time in all sorts of situations. But what does this little word “blessed” actually mean? All too often, we use it when we feel good and everything is going our way. But if this is our definition of being blessed, what happens when things aren’t picture perfect? What do we do when we feel more stressed than blessed? Because ultimately, being blessed isn’t about the things we have or the way we feel. It’s about becoming who God is shaping us to be.

Intentional Interaction 

• Why do you think people associate wealth or prosperity with blessing?
• If you had to redefine the word blessing now, how would you describe it?

For The Parent's Heart

Over the next few weeks we'll leave you with some helpful tips as you move into the Thanksgiving and Christmas seasons to help your family understand the meaning of "Blessed" a little better.

1. Be a Student of What They are Learning
Think about the last time you heard the word “blessed.” What came to mind? For many of us—and many of our students—the word blessed conjures up images of the coolest clothes, the newest gadgets and a worry-free life. But when we look at what God has to say about being blessed, we realize that we probably have things pretty mixed up. Because if being blessed is more about our relationships—and what we do with them—than the stuff we have, we may have some reevaluating to do in order to redefine what it means to be blessed and realize that we might already be more blessed than we originally thought.

What's Happenin @ Fwd Mid-Week

Below is a brief summary of what talked about this week. Most of the time we teach through a series for several weeks at a time that way students that miss can get caught back up quickly, and so we can dissect a topic more fully than just a one night deal. Use the overview and questions for both you and your teen to answer and have a dialog that continues outside the church walls and into your homes. Use this opportunity to see what God is teaching your student and also allow your student to see what God is teaching/taught you.

Current Series:

Thirty-five hundred years ago Moses came down from Mt. Sinai with a short list of rules that has shaped the values of people and nations for centuries. We know them as the Ten Commandments, but do we really know them? Many people believe that the rules are a condition for a relationship with God, things we must do to get in His good graces. But just the opposite is true. The relationship came before the rules. And the commandments were meant to not only reveal God’s heart, but to keep His people free.

This Week's Recap:

Week # 6 (10.28.2015): Wrap Up

Bottom Line: God's plan for our freedom is to live within his desired plan.

Tonight we are putting a final touch on the topic.  What is the one thing that helped the Israelites hold true to this law?  It was an amazing experience that they had a the base of a mountain where God appeared to Moses.  This awe-inspiring moment solidified in their minds who God was and just how majestic he was.  For us, our moment of awe is the cross.  Everyone of us should live differently as a result of what took place on another mountain.

Intentional Interaction 

• What has been the biggest "game changer" you've learned through this series?
• Do you see your relationship with God in a different light? How so?
• What's one area of the top ten you need to work on?

Parents Pass Their Anxieties to Their Kids

Do parents pass along anxiety to their kids through nature or nurture? A recent study says
in effect, yes. The research found that anxiety is not only genetically passed on from
parents to kids, but also through exposure to parents’ anxious tendencies.
Researchers found that anxiety could be transmitted from parent to child by observing the
parents’ fears or worries in their actions or overhearing their conversations. Kids would
then adopt those same worries. Parents also passed along their anxiety by unnecessarily
shielding their kids from something they feared.
On the flip side, parents were also found to perpetuate their children’s existing anxieties by
altering their parenting choices to allow their kids to avoid facing anxiety producing
experiences.
What Can Parents Do?
• Make the decision to meet your personal anxieties head-on, and develop healthy
strategies for coping with them. Evaluate your anxiety-levels, and identify your primary
anxieties. Do you have appropriate strategies for coping with your anxieties? If not, why
not? Your goal should be to make your home as emotionally stable and anxiety-free as
possible for your children.
• Consider the ways that your anxieties manifest themselves at home and in family life.
What examples are you providing your kids regarding how to deal with anxieties in life?
How can you improve your role modeling?
• Evaluate the extent to which you see your own anxieties being passed along to your
children. If you find that your kids have similar anxieties, be proactive in teaching and
practicing coping skills together.
• Try not to enable your children’s anxieties by helping them to avoid situations or
experiences that trigger them. For example, if your child fears visiting a dentist, delaying
dental care should not be a viable option. In the long run, it’s far better to help your kids
face their anxieties, resolve them whenever possible, or to teach healthy coping skills for
those that cannot be resolved.

What's Happenin @ Fwd Mid-Week

Below is a brief summary of what talked about this week. Most of the time we teach through a series for several weeks at a time that way students that miss can get caught back up quickly, and so we can dissect a topic more fully than just a one night deal. Use the overview and questions for both you and your teen to answer and have a dialog that continues outside the church walls and into your homes. Use this opportunity to see what God is teaching your student and also allow your student to see what God is teaching/taught you.

Current Series:

Thirty-five hundred years ago Moses came down from Mt. Sinai with a short list of rules that has shaped the values of people and nations for centuries. We know them as the Ten Commandments, but do we really know them? Many people believe that the rules are a condition for a relationship with God, things we must do to get in His good graces. But just the opposite is true. The relationship came before the rules. And the commandments were meant to not only reveal God’s heart, but to keep His people free.

This Week's Recap:

Week # 5 (10.21.2015): Unto Others

Bottom Line: God places value on each person, and desires for everyone to be free.

The final six commandments illustrate a key truth about God—He cares a great deal about how we treat each other. In fact, these commandments were so revolutionary at the time because they showed that everyone had worth and value. God gave us these laws, not as some type of admissions test into heaven, but as instructions on how to live and be free in Him. He knows that not only is our relationship with Him important, but so are the relationships He has placed in our lives.

Intentional Interaction 

• Go through the final six commandments (Exodus 20:12-17) and discuss how these commands are about valuing other people. 
• Talk about ways we “steal,” “murder” etc one another, ways that may go beyond our traditional definition of these words. 

What's Happenin @ Fwd Mid-Week

Below is a brief summary of what talked about this week. Most of the time we teach through a series for several weeks at a time that way students that miss can get caught back up quickly, and so we can dissect a topic more fully than just a one night deal. Use the overview and questions for both you and your teen to answer and have a dialog that continues outside the church walls and into your homes. Use this opportunity to see what God is teaching your student and also allow your student to see what God is teaching/taught you.

Current Series:

Thirty-five hundred years ago Moses came down from Mt. Sinai with a short list of rules that has shaped the values of people and nations for centuries. We know them as the Ten Commandments, but do we really know them? Many people believe that the rules are a condition for a relationship with God, things we must do to get in His good graces. But just the opposite is true. The relationship came before the rules. And the commandments were meant to not only reveal God’s heart, but to keep His people free.

This Week's Recap:

Week # 4 (10.14.2015): Do Nothing

Bottom Line: When we stop and acknowledge how God has cared for us and our world, we realize who is really in control.

How crazy is your life? Doesn’t it seem like the weeks go by so fast? Okay, maybe not the school day or your shift at work—but the rest of your time, like your free time—how much of it seems to just disappear before you know it? What if you were more intentional with your time? More specifically, what if you spent time each week pausing, reflecting and acknowledging what God has done for you and everyone else the rest of the week? What if you took time to stop, rest and realize that no matter how much you thought you were in control of every minute, He was really in control all along?

Intentional Interaction

• What has God done for you this week? 
• How can you be more in tune with noticing what He does around you? 

What's Happenin @ Fwd Mid-Week

Below is a brief summary of what talked about this week. Most of the time we teach through a series for several weeks at a time that way students that miss can get caught back up quickly, and so we can dissect a topic more fully than just a one night deal. Use the overview and questions for both you and your teen to answer and have a dialog that continues outside the church walls and into your homes. Use this opportunity to see what God is teaching your student and also allow your student to see what God is teaching/taught you.

Current Series:

Thirty-five hundred years ago Moses came down from Mt. Sinai with a short list of rules that has shaped the values of people and nations for centuries. We know them as the Ten Commandments, but do we really know them? Many people believe that the rules are a condition for a relationship with God, things we must do to get in His good graces. But just the opposite is true. The relationship came before the rules. And the commandments were meant to not only reveal God’s heart, but to keep His people free.

This Week's Recap:

Week # 3 (10.07.2015): That's Not My Name

Bottom Line: When you use the name of God to dodge the will of God, you will ultimately miss out on God entirely.

Have you ever said God’s name when you were angry or rattled off “OMG”? If so, you may have heard someone talk about you breaking one of the Ten—the one about misusing God’s name. But there’s much more to this command. Just think about it, do you think that’s all God was concerned about? Do you think that was the only reason He put it on such an important list? The reality is that we abuse God’s name when we choose to use it for our own selfish purposes—and that’s a dangerous game that involves more than just a careless slip of the tongue. If we dodge the will of God in the name of God, then we run the risk of missing God entirely.

Intentional Interaction

• Beyond swearing, what are some examples in history or in our world today of people abusing God’s name? 
• What are some situations when you are tempted to abuse God’s name?

Registration for TCTC is OPEN:

TCTC (or Tennessee Christian Teen Convention) is a great opportunity for your teens to grow in their relationship with Christ and their student ministry group.

This is an amazing trip for ALL our Sr High and Jr High students and one we want to challenge all our students to attend.  With it's low cost (compared to other retreats) and it's close proximity, it's is an ideal conference to set a goal as this..

Here's what you need to know:

The dates: 

January 8-10

The location:

Gatlinburg TN

The Cost:

$150 (this is all inclusive: which means you pay that amount and that's it, no extra food, no "oh forgot to mentions", no nothing.  This includes everything.  I have found this is the easiest way to charge for trips, makes things simple)

The Cheapest Cost: 

The cost is the cheapest till November 2nd, that's when the cost goes up by $15, so register early.

What's needed at registration: 

Just a contact email, the shirt size of the teen (yeah a free t-shirt) and $50 deposit as soon as you can.

Is it refundable: 

Not really, the church foots the bill on the conference so you can take as long as you need to pay, so if you back out it's like Jesus himself has to pay, sorry, not really, just had to throw a little guilt in there.

Where do you register: 

You can register anytime on line at our registration page ( here) or you can register at the church at the student table outside the student rooms.

I can't swing the price:

HMCC has a no child left behind policy so that if there ever is a need for teen to attend a trip and funds are the primary restraint, we will always figure out a way to get that student there.  Just see Nathan and he can get you squared away.

What's Happenin @ Fwd Mid-Week

Below is a brief summary of what talked about this week. Most of the time we teach through a series for several weeks at a time that way students that miss can get caught back up quickly, and so we can dissect a topic more fully than just a one night deal. Use the overview and questions for both you and your teen to answer and have a dialog that continues outside the church walls and into your homes. Use this opportunity to see what God is teaching your student and also allow your student to see what God is teaching/taught you.

Current Series:

Thirty-five hundred years ago Moses came down from Mt. Sinai with a short list of rules that has shaped the values of people and nations for centuries. We know them as the Ten Commandments, but do we really know them? Many people believe that the rules are a condition for a relationship with God, things we must do to get in His good graces. But just the opposite is true. The relationship came before the rules. And the commandments were meant to not only reveal God’s heart, but to keep His people free.

This Week's Recap:

Week # 2 (9.30-2015): One & Only

Bottom Line: The most important decision you make is what you place in the center of your life.

The first two commandments—“You shall have no other gods before me” and “You shall not make for yourself an idol”— are two of the most often forgotten. They have nothing to do with ego—in fact, they have more to do with us. If our lives revolved around God, then all of the other commandments, such as stealing, lying, adultery, etc., wouldn’t be an issue. So what would your life look like if you had no other gods but God?

Intentional Interaction

• What are some things that are other “gods” in your life?  
• How can we help each other not make those “gods” the center of our lives?

What's Happenin @ Fwd Mid-Week

Below is a brief summary of what talked about this week. Most of the time we teach through a series for several weeks at a time that way students that miss can get caught back up quickly, and so we can dissect a topic more fully than just a one night deal. Use the overview and questions for both you and your teen to answer and have a dialog that continues outside the church walls and into your homes. Use this opportunity to see what God is teaching your student and also allow your student to see what God is teaching/taught you.

Current Series:

Thirty-five hundred years ago Moses came down from Mt. Sinai with a short list of rules that has shaped the values of people and nations for centuries. We know them as the Ten Commandments, but do we really know them? Many people believe that the rules are a condition for a relationship with God, things we must do to get in His good graces. But just the opposite is true. The relationship came before the rules. And the commandments were meant to not only reveal God’s heart, but to keep His people free.

This Week's Recap:

Week # 1 (9.23-2015):The Rules

Bottom Line: Relationship always precedes rules with God.

Too many, Christianity is about following a set of rules. And if you asked them “Why?” they would point to a single source—the Bible. Specifically, they would probably mention the Ten Commandments. But what most people miss is the whole context for that list. God established a relationship with the Israelites long before He even gave them the rules. He wanted them to know they were His people. The reality is that following the rules will never make God love us more. In fact, when you try to live them out, you begin to see just how much you need Him. With God, the relationship always precedes the rules. Always.

Intentional Interaction

The relationship and rules connection is something that you live with in your role as parent/child. Talk about how relationship always precedes rules in your home.